Feelings Transform: A Homily for Young People of All Ages
Offered at the Unitarian Universalist Church of Lafayette, Indiana
September 16, 2001

A bowl of ice cubes was passed out to the children as we settle down and they were holding the ice cubes as they were sitting and listening. Feelings transform if you hold them close, and share them, and give them time. Feelings can change when you understand them and don’t pretend they are not really there. This holiday we are thinking about today is Rosh Hashanah, which means the head of the year. It is the Jewish New Year, as some of you have learned in religious education, and it is an important time to Jewish people because the new Year is taken seriously as a time of new beginning – a time to think about the last year and to think ahead about how the next one could be better. About how we could each make it better. A horn called a Shofar is blown and that sound is supposed to awaken those who hear it to a better life – a kinder life, a fairer life, smarter life. Sometimes the children will take bread crumbs and scatter them on water to stand for the idea of throwing away your faults – and the crumbs are carried away by the flow of water.

But I had something else in mind this week – with all the hard stuff that has happened this week – with the tragedy in our country. I think that people are feeling a lot – sometimes feeling mad, sometimes scared, sometimes, very sad. Different feelings and lots of feelings. Some of these feelings are easier to live with than others – but they are hard to throw away – in fact, you may try to throw them away but they belong to you.

I don’t believe that we can just throw away our feelings – or our memories – in fact the world that we experience stays with us in many ways. Although we cannot throw away our feelings, memories, our experiences we can transform them – we can change them – we can change by understanding them. Like walking on uneven ground. Like when two people get mad at each other because they have heard each other wrong -- I had a friend who would say yum bunny when she got really excited – it was a weird expression and the first few times she said it I thought that maybe she was calling me a dumb bunny. Finally I asked her about it and after that I felt better – my feelings were changed because I learned – I gained understanding. Or did you ever feel sort of cranky and then discover that you were maybe sick – maybe you have a fever or something – and then you go to rest. Your feelings change when you realize that you are not just a cranky person but that you’re sick! – and once you know you are sick you can take care of yourself instead of wandering around sick and cranky. Our feelings change – our lives change -- when we understand what they are – jut like understanding changes everything.

Are you aware of that cold ice cube in your hand? Is it melting? It has begun to drip from being held in the warmth of your hand. Sometimes when we feel bad – it helps to be held – even to figure out how to be sweet to yourself – and then the difficult feeling may change. Sometimes you feel better just because you talk about a feeling – when I was a kid another kid in my neighborhood told me something that just wasn’t true -- that an awful storm was coming that night – I almost believed her – I was scared – I did not want to go to bed that night. Finally, I decided to tell my Dad about it. And he told me that what she had told me was just not true. Even things that are not misunderstandings can and do change. Sometimes just telling my Dad if I was scared at night would make me feel less scared. Mostly, if we learn about ourselves and our feelings they will change and grow. At any rate, they will change. How much ice do you have left? You can get help holding your scared feeling until it melts away, or your anger, or worry – until it melts or changes.

There is another example that I would like to share with you. Have you ever taken trash and made a compost heap to fertilize your garden? Compost transforms garbage into new plants and fertile soil.

We are all transformers of feelings and of life.

Enjoy your classes today.